(Joe) Jessica Alba looks like she was punched in the face in that trailer.
(Scott) Verizon wireless is not for people with paranoia issues.
(Joe) That Element looks awesome.
(Scott) Oooh, I need to get a high income so I can qualify for an American Express and watch a special preview for next week's Prison Break
(Scott) Missed the time -- too busy avoiding Jeff Foxworthy's gaze.
(Joe) You mean the missing sectors?
(Joe) "It's not going to be for anyone's benefit if you're covering for him."
(Scott) Morris is missing sectors, but it's because of a file lock.
(Joe) "Your data merge is incomplete."
(Joe) He *meant* to leave out those sectors. They'll be in the final report. Which makes sense when you're trying to stop a terrorist attack.
(Scott) The worst part of Logan's house arrest, the ceiling to ceiling wood paneling.
(Joe) He likes horsies.
(Joe) Psalms 40:2
(Scott) We have no juristiction at the consulate. Our only recourse there are the kill squads we've sent before.
(Scott) While everyone else is trying to save the world, Chloe is in an after-school special.
(Joe) 'Morris has been dead for TEN years!'
(Joe) Jeanne shouldn't have been his sponsor in the first place.
(Joe) Hey, at least *I* didn't arm nuclear weapons for terrorists today.
(Scott) Morris is smooth . . .
(Joe) Vodka, man.
(Scott) I was just using it as aftershave, anyhow . . .
(Joe) "Melinda, have we heard from Tom Lennox?" No. And my name is Steve.
(Joe) Is he picking gnats off his scalp?
(Scott) He was just being a tease all along . . .
(Joe) Wow, sneaking a bomb into the secured bunker of the President sure is a lot of work.
(Scott) After this, highlighters will be banned from the White House. Everyone will just have to underline.
(Scott) 624 Enter.
(Scott) Do I hold Enter down while pressing 624? Or do I do this afterward.
(Joe) The kill radius will be ten feet.