"You're working against us." I've heard that's 80% of your job description, but it's not in mine.
"Please come with us, Ms. O'Brien."
"jack Bauer is a very sensitive problem." A sensitive, sensitive, killing machine.
"I'll recall my team, sir." They would have been killed anyway.
"He's the President. He can do what he wants." Ever since the Republicans passed that bill after 9/11 he can execute people at will.
"CTU thinks they've got Bauer."
"These people brokered chemical weapons to terrorists. They killed an ex-President." They made a deal with the Commies. They deserve Steven-Segal-like justice with a Chuck Norris kicker.
"I've been on other things. I'll get back to you." (I took the kids to Sea World and I attended a SAG meeting.) "Thanks, Michael."
"What's up, Mike?"
"Bauer's more likely to cooperate with them rather than military police he doesn't know."
"It's the President's call. I can see it both ways."
"DOD Operations." "Put me through to General Warren, please."
"Can you give me an update on the search for Jack Bauer." "We've never received such a call." I tell you what, Mike, I want no part of finding Jack Bauer. My unit's down on personnel as it is.
"You should try to get some rest, Mr. President."
"What is it you want, Mike?"
"Karen Hayes at Homeland raised a few good points."
"I'm a little mystified by some things." Why do men have nipples, Mr. President?
"You told Homeland you wanted the military to pick up Jack Bauer..."
"May I ask who you did go through?" "I don't answer to you."
"Bauer presents special circumstances. The Chinese government may know he's still alive." Oh, watched old episodes, have you?
"You know what, Mike. I'm tired of being second guessed." I'm also tired of being, uh, guessed.
"That's the one recommendation of yours I intend to take. Thank you, Mike."
[12:25]

"You think the rules don't apply to you since you're smarter than the rest of us." Well, you're not. And your makeup makes you look like a whore. And I don't like you.
"You helped Audrey Raines escape." Stab her. Stab her.
"I know who I'm addressing. And I think you know what this is about." You can kiss my ass, Chuck.
"James Heller is on his way here."
"Heller's not stupid enough to carry it with him."
"You phone me the second you have the evidence in hand."
[12:36]